Tuesday, February 22, 2011

Update, soooon.

I have so much to think, so much to say, so much to act.
I need some time to figure out everything, figure out what is on my mind.
Oh yeah.
But I do not have much time to say them now.
Yea, I need to figure them out first.
What a messy mind I have.
I need to get things settled, I need to.
I am gonna update myself soon, I hope.

p.s : Love watching the scandal.

p.p.s : I do not want to break my circle.

p.p.p.s : Just ignore me. I am invisible, as always.


Monday, February 14, 2011

Dream a little dream of me

Stars shining bright above you
Night breezes seem to whisper "I love you"
Birds singin’ in the sycamore trees
Dream a little dream of me

Say nighty-night and kiss me
Just hold me tight and tell me you’ll miss me
While I’m alone and blue as can be
Dream a little dream of me

Stars fading but I linger on dear
Still craving your kiss
I’m longin’ to linger till dawn dear
Just saying this

Sweet dreams till sunbeams find you
Sweet dreams that leave all worries behind you
But in your dreams whatever they be
Dream a little dream of me

Yes, dream a little dream of me.

Just a random post. It's a jazzy song btw. I love this song.
Anyway, Happy Valentine's Day!

p.s : It is just another ordinary day to me but it reminds me about something. :)


Wednesday, February 9, 2011

Think straight

is what I am telling myself to do now.

I tell myself to believe in myself, but I don't.
Now I don't know how much longer I can hold on.
Although the night is long, the sun will rise.
And someday my wound will get well.
I don't have enough confidence to overcome this by myself.
I hope it helps now. I hope God helps me, please.

Don't know what am I saying? It is not your problem.
Just that I have been living in my own world lately. Hah.

Highlight of the day : When I finally decided to cut my hair short and have the guts to go to the saloon, sat down on the chair, took off my glasses, got ready everything, the hairdresser refused to cut my hair. How awesome.


Tuesday, February 8, 2011

Sound of silence

Hello darkness, my old friend, I've come to talk with you again,
Because a vision softly creeping, Left its seeds while I was sleeping,
And the vision that was planted in my brain,
Still remains, within the sound of silence.

In restless dreams I walked alone, Narrow streets of cobblestone,
'neath the halo of a street lamp, I turned my collar to the cold and damp
When my eyes were stabbed by the flash of a neon light
That split the night, and touched the sound of silence.

And in the naked light I saw, Ten thousand people, maybe more.
People talking without speaking, People hearing without listening,
People writing songs, that voices never share.
And no one dared, Disturb the sound of silence.

"Fools" said I, "You do not know, Silence like a cancer grows.
Hear my words that I might teach you, Take my arms that I might reach you."
But my words like silent raindrops fell,
And echoed, In the wells of silence

And the people bowed and prayed, To the neon god they made.
And the sign flashed out its warning, In the words that it was forming.
And the sign said, "The words of the prophets are written on the subway walls
And tenement halls." and whisper'd in the sounds of silence.

I sometimes hope that I could not hear anything, so that my world will be peaceful.
I sometimes hope that I could not talk, so that I will not say anything wrong or say something hurtful to people.
I sometimes hope that I could not feel, so that I will not be sad and disappointed.
I sometimes hope that I could not see, so that I will not see all the tragedies and dramas happening around me.

But the world is so wonderful, I do not want to miss the chance to enjoy the beautiful world because of the small, little annoying, disappointing stuffs happening around me. Somehow, you will just get so fed up with the things that happens again and again to you.

At that time, I will choose... to be in the world of silence, where no one will realize it.


Monday, February 7, 2011

Second breakdown

is what I am facing now.

Somehow, things will just happen out of our control. The terrible feelings are back again, feelings that I fear the most. I thought it is just simple, but it is complicated to the others. And that leads to making me confused and afraid. I already have enough. I do not need it no more, seriously.

I really had a hard time fighting with my inner self. I keep telling myself that I am not wrong, I did not do anything. But there are voices in my head saying that I am the cause of everything. Please stop whispering those words to me. GO AWAYYY!!

I know I am going to get over it soon, real soon. That is what I hope. I do not want to get drowned anymore. It is hard to gasp for air. I am done with this. I know it is ending soon. Yea, I am done.

p.s : I have no choice but to trust you.

p.p.s : Somehow, I find it hard to trust you now.

p.p.p.s : Martini, please! Thank you.